friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
