Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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