new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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