Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize