Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Randomize
