Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
my liver is dry heaving
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
