i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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