hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
