How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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