so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
