she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
