Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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