you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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