I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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