You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
