dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize