going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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