even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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