This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
