Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Quick, to the slutcave!
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
