Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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