dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
we're so committed to being not committed
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
