is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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