i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
