Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
