im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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