So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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