I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize