I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
