i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
