check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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