so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
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