His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
