My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize