sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
