He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
