I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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