It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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