Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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