i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
