Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
