It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
