I got chris browned last night
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
