Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
