im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
