Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
