Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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