My vagina just recognized that song.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
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Do I have a choice?
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Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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