I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
