Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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